Not dead yet!

I haven't blogged here for a little while - it suddenly occurred to me this morning that if anyone who doesn't know me in real life has been reading my updates, they might just put 2 and 2 together and get 5 and assume the worst has happened.   But... I'm not dead yet!  Nor am I nearly dead in any way shape or form.  I am absolutely fine - I started to feel like I was boring people by blogging every day, so took a small break from it, but now I feel like putting some more of my thoughts etc out there, drivel or not.  So perhaps a crisis of blogging confidence.

Also, I have been busy, there is quite a lot to report since I last posted.  

I had an echocardiogram on 15th July, and an Exercise Tolerance Test where the cardiac nurses tried to kill me with exercise.   I did feel like I was dying at the end, but not for any heart-related reason.  I managed 9 minutes on the treadmill, with the speed and incline going up every couple of minutes.  I was proud of myself for keeping going - it was scary as I was afraid that something bad could happen, like a bit of angina, or even worse another heart attack.  But everything seemed to pass smoothly.  I was very disgruntled by the fact that they couldn't tell me anything at all about how I'd done, or what they found on the echocardiogram, as I was expecting more information to be forthcoming, but that has to wait until I see the consultant on 19th August. 

In the meantime I've been allowed to start on the cardiac rehabilitation programme.  I had my pre-assessment today, and had to give my consent to being made to exercise twice a week for 5 weeks.  I start the actual programme next Wednesday.  

In many of my earlier posts I think I mention twinges and the psychological worries that occur when you get any kind of pain between your chin and your belly button.  I had an adventure to A&E last Friday after the twinge in my shoulder that I've had a few times before persisted, and I couldn't be sure it wasn't heart related.  As my anxiety levels were soaring I decided (with help from S) that going to A&E and getting checked out was the best way forward.  So I had a heart trace done, bp checked - it was high but I was feeling anxious so they let me off.  The trace was fine, and they examined my shoulder and I have a 'wear and tear' injury to the joint. It has a very long name, but that is basically the crux of it.  The good news is all of those twinges I was having are from that, and are not heart related.  I felt a bit of a hypochondriac as normally that level of pain wouldn't get me near a doctor, but I couldn't take the risk.  Thankfully the doctor at the hospital agreed I had done the right thing, and equally thankfully, despite it being late on a Friday afternoon with York Races going on, A&E was relatively quiet.

So basically I am doing fine, things are progressing.  The biggest deal is probably that I am starting back at work on Monday, on a phased return.  I'm waiting for contact from Occupational Health which should happen in the next few days, but I have a phased return plan that I worked out with the Cardiac Rehab nurse and hopefully they will be ok with that.  I'm half looking forward to being back at work (I love my job and my colleagues basically) but half of me is a little apprehensive.