Friday, 1 July 2016

Worrying developments

My post today continues from where I left off yesterday really - I am getting really concerned that I don't know how to change some of the behaviours that have led me to have a heart attack.  I've had a few worries over the last couple of days and have been unable to stop myself from getting wound up about them, and also from dwelling on them.  I've had various suggestions about how I might stop myself from fretting about things, and I guess I need to work through them.

Basically I've ended up involved in sorting out part of my mother in law's care again because I can't just leave her when I think she is suffering and she really did need checking over by a doctor, and my father in law was reluctant to take her until next week.  I just can't keep out of things - but does that mean I'm doing something wrong?   I then ended up having to go with her to the docs, and look after her while she had a blood test while my father in law popped home to get something.  Easier said than done I have to say, but I managed, but I'm sure it wasn't the best thing for my blood pressure!   I had to grab her hand to stop her from grabbing the needle because it hurt when it went in.  Good job I'm not squeamish!

Then today I've been worrying about school and what classes the boys are going to be in next year.  They keep delaying letting parents know which makes me think that there is going to be something likely to upset parents.  I'm really concerned about M, he'll be Year 5 and I think he is way underachieving because school don't challenge him and their expectations seem low to me.  I know he is capable of so much more.  I wish we were loaded so I could send him to private school sometimes, but failing that I think next year I will have to look at options for getting him some extra tuition.  I just want people to see his potential - I am not expecting him to be top of the class or anything, but I just want to see them get the best out of him, and inspire him. He is coasting and he is bored, and has no interest in schoolwork.
For J, I expect he'll probably end up staying in Class 2, because he is one of the younger ones, while the others move to class 3 with older children and a better teacher. If that happens, he'll be absolutely gutted.   I'd also like him to be moved away from a couple of children in that class who's behaviour is lets say... suspect.  Of course they are also in the younger half of the class.

We were told in a newsletter that we would be told today about the classes, but we have had no communication so far.  Rumour has it that the Head doesn't want to release it until after tomorrow's school summer fair.  I guess he wants to be well out of the way when the s**t hits the fan....  Aaarghh!

Health wise, I feel fine although I did feel stressed earlier, and I don't know what I can do to deal with it differently.  Writing about it has helped, and I know I can't do much about the school situation, but I also don't know how to switch off the worrying - and I need to learn how to do that and fast.   Any advice would be much appreciated - one thing I need to do is look at Stephen Covey's 7 habits book as one of my friends who is also a psychologist has suggested I work through something in there.  Worth a try I guess....  

On the plus side - the cats seem to be getting along a little better - still the odd hiss, but they are not stressed out by each other's presence any more.  Here's a picture taken earlier - pretty good!

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